Week 3: April 19-25

Dudes, last week:

Team	BA	OBP	SLG	ERA	K/9	W/9	HR/9	BIPA
Ballard Killbots	0.229	0.316	0.356	4.23	10.36	4.38	0.88	0.305
BattlestarGrantica	0.269	0.371	0.469	7.29	5.79	3.64	1.29	0.365
Bumpin' Utleys	0.325	0.372	0.483	3.00	5.80	2.40	0.40	0.269
ConfusedCricketClub	0.291	0.335	0.467	2.21	6.79	1.87	0.68	0.201
Halfprice Henchmen	0.298	0.417	0.425	5.00	5.80	1.60	1.20	0.321
Hammarby	0.292	0.345	0.440	3.34	5.92	1.97	0.15	0.302
Honkbal Staars	0.277	0.329	0.421	1.50	8.57	4.50	0.21	0.283
Ichi-Chone FLeelix	0.246	0.313	0.383	5.40	6.08	4.95	0.68	0.301
Mike Sweeny Fan Club	0.256	0.367	0.419	4.01	7.84	4.38	0.91	0.261
Most Valuable Mauers	0.275	0.359	0.441	3.63	8.05	2.60	1.04	0.263
Return of the ATPL	0.223	0.281	0.355	3.00	7.88	2.81	1.13	0.261
Sam Zell is a Douche	0.310	0.383	0.510	3.23	11.08	3.23	0.69	0.324
SLUT Dodgers	0.227	0.317	0.365	2.21	7.11	3.00	0.63	0.250
WalnutCreekWolfpack	0.268	0.329	0.409	4.83	8.33	3.00	1.67	0.268
WestSideConnectGang	0.218	0.291	0.394	4.21	6.51	1.34	0.77	0.335
League Average	0.267	0.342	0.423	3.82	7.57	3.07	0.83	0.292

I thought it looked like down week for offense, since only one team slugged .500+, but the league still scraped together a .765OPS vs .784OPS last week. I guess that's because nobody had that bad of a week. No, I take that back. Jason's generic Telecom-sounding team, ATPL, and Killbots did not have much going for them this week.

Pitching, on the other hand, had a bunch of good lines! SLUT (dodgers)-- solid. Staaaaars-- solid. Douchy-- solid. CCC-- solid. Battlestar-- SUPER SOLID. This season sucks already.

Here is the whole thang:

Team	BA	OBP	SLG	ERA	K/9	W/9	HR/9	BIPA
Sam Zell is a Douche	0.297	0.372	0.507	3.67	10.00	3.26	1.09	0.280
Hammarby	0.278	0.334	0.433	3.20	6.58	2.35	0.51	0.283
WalnutCreekWolfpack	0.281	0.356	0.453	3.71	8.09	2.80	1.22	0.249
ConfusedCricketClub	0.247	0.316	0.392	3.06	6.98	2.45	0.80	0.252
Most Valuable Mauers	0.263	0.351	0.450	3.15	6.95	3.37	0.72	0.275
SLUT Dodgers	0.252	0.348	0.414	3.01	7.86	4.06	0.79	0.261
Return of the ATPL	0.272	0.338	0.489	3.05	7.50	3.40	0.90	0.285
WestSideConnectGang	0.254	0.331	0.422	4.29	7.71	3.24	1.16	0.290
Halfprice Henchmen	0.292	0.375	0.437	3.77	5.96	2.37	0.85	0.278
Mike Sweeny Fan Club	0.265	0.349	0.471	4.09	6.93	4.03	0.92	0.253
Honkbal Staars	0.255	0.309	0.400	3.52	8.34	4.29	0.95	0.272
Ballard Killbots	0.241	0.338	0.408	4.40	9.66	5.12	0.99	0.314
Bumpin' Utleys	0.296	0.360	0.457	3.23	6.66	2.61	0.48	0.282
Ichi-Chone FLeelix	0.257	0.324	0.394	4.66	6.77	4.14	0.79	0.298
BattlestarGrantica	0.242	0.371	0.436	6.19	7.55	3.20	1.50	0.325
League Average	0.267	0.345	0.438	3.80	7.57	3.37	0.91	0.280

Check it out, Killbots improved their pitcher walk rate! I am going to see how many weeks I can go into the season with a 6.00+ ERA. My goal is -3.

Keep up the good work, dudes!

Week 2: April 12-18

Guys, check out this screengrab for Yahoo's long-awaited iPhone fantasy baseball app:

WORTH THE WAIT!!! That is a lot of passed-ball strike threes! Also, I love "1.24" innings pitched. So crazy yet so specific! This is a good lesson for us all: If you are going to make shit up, do it to at least two decimal places. At least the Win column looks about right. THE MARINERS ARE GOING TO WIN TWO WORLD SERIES THIS YEAR.

This sort of reminds me of the box cover of the cribbage board my parents have. There are two kids having a fucking BLAST playing cribbage (which is suspicious in itself). In the picture, one player has two pegs fairly close together as might be found in legitimate gameplay, but the other player has three pegs evenly distributed throughout the board. This made me think that my dad was holding back on me as far as the rules went, since I always had to play with two measly pegs. It wasn't until MUCH later (I believed that there was some magical rule that would earn me an extra peg WAY longer than I probably should have) that I finally understood that this particular box cover was not put together by cribbage geniuses, but by some disinterested photographer. "Put those tiny sticks in the board with the holes. HURRY! Bobby ate one of the tiny sticks? Fine. Bobby plays with two sticks. I DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THIS! I am late for an appointment to take pictures of shoes".

I guess I just think it's awesome that someone was putting together the promotional material for a stat-obsessive application and didn't bother to spend the five minutes figuring out what a normal baseball line would be. That's how busy those guys at Yahoo are!

AAAANYWAAAAY, last week:

Team	BA	OBP	SLG	ERA	K/9	W/9	HR/9	BIPA
Ballard Killbots	0.195	0.285	0.337	4.91	8.12	5.48	1.13	0.324
BattlestarGrantica	0.232	0.346	0.465	7.00	9.00	3.75	0.75	0.333
Bumpin' Utleys	0.276	0.358	0.431	3.15	6.98	2.93	0.23	0.299
ConfusedCricketClub	0.240	0.324	0.325	4.83	6.00	2.83	1.17	0.272
Halfprice Henchmen	0.300	0.369	0.490	3.97	5.80	2.75	1.07	0.284
Hammarby	0.253	0.318	0.424	2.96	7.08	2.14	0.33	0.267
Honkbal Staars	0.219	0.302	0.426	2.91	7.62	4.43	0.83	0.231
Ichi-Chone FLeelix	0.277	0.333	0.406	2.96	7.58	2.77	0.74	0.234
Mike Sweeny Fan Club	0.251	0.340	0.474	4.68	5.58	4.14	1.26	0.242
Most Valuable Mauers	0.257	0.354	0.466	2.41	7.46	3.95	0.66	0.252
Return of the ATPL	0.285	0.346	0.487	2.95	7.71	3.63	0.91	0.303
Sam Zell is a Douche	0.305	0.347	0.525	3.35	10.67	2.30	0.63	0.310
SLUT Dodgers	0.218	0.313	0.322	3.32	8.93	5.19	0.83	0.256
WalnutCreekWolfpack	0.333	0.422	0.549	3.80	6.40	3.40	1.00	0.237
WestSideConnectGang	0.288	0.373	0.486	3.63	9.52	2.60	1.21	0.273
League Average	0.263	0.343	0.441	3.82	7.67	3.52	0.88	0.277

Yikes, Killbots. Yikes, SLUT (Dodgers). WCW--save some for the rest of us! Pitching kind of sucked this week. Sam Zell had some pretty awesome components. Ham/Arbys, Staaaaaaars, and fLeEl1x were solid. Battlestar took this battle to the upper stratus and DOMINATED. Killbots are too busy throwing tiny balls at dudes to aim them. HURRY! They might get away!

Season:

Team	BA	OBP	SLG	ERA	K/9	W/9	HR/9	BIPA
Sam Zell is a Douche	0.289	0.366	0.505	3.86	9.55	3.28	1.25	0.261
WalnutCreekWolfpack	0.288	0.369	0.475	3.06	7.95	2.68	0.96	0.238
Hammarby	0.271	0.328	0.429	3.12	6.98	2.57	0.73	0.271
Most Valuable Mauers	0.256	0.346	0.454	2.97	6.53	3.66	0.59	0.279
SLUT Dodgers	0.266	0.364	0.440	3.48	8.17	4.68	0.87	0.261
WestSideConnectGang	0.274	0.351	0.436	4.32	8.22	4.07	1.33	0.266
ConfusedCricketClub	0.227	0.307	0.358	3.46	6.91	2.71	0.84	0.271
Halfprice Henchmen	0.289	0.354	0.442	3.23	6.03	2.71	0.70	0.257
Return of the ATPL	0.297	0.367	0.559	3.09	7.27	3.75	0.77	0.298
Mike Sweeny Fan Club	0.268	0.340	0.492	4.14	6.41	3.83	0.93	0.249
Honkbal Staars	0.243	0.299	0.389	4.20	8.08	4.12	1.21	0.262
Ichi-Chone FLeelix	0.262	0.329	0.399	4.36	7.05	3.80	0.84	0.297
Bumpin' Utleys	0.281	0.354	0.444	3.26	6.93	2.65	0.51	0.281
BattlestarGrantica	0.229	0.371	0.420	5.68	8.37	2.99	1.59	0.302
Ballard Killbots	0.247	0.348	0.434	4.40	8.81	5.56	1.04	0.311
League Average	0.266	0.346	0.446	3.79	7.55	3.52	0.95	0.274

Good work, gang!

Week 1: April 4-11

Dudes:

Another mighty season full of deeds of legend is upon us. Such as:

Team	BA	OBP	SLG	ERA	K/9	W/9	HR/9	BIPA
Sam Zell is a Douche	0.272	0.385	0.483	4.29	8.58	4.11	1.79	0.220
SLUT Dodgers	0.313	0.413	0.557	3.66	7.32	4.12	0.92	0.265
ConfusedCricketClub	0.213	0.289	0.391	1.61	7.66	2.42	0.40	0.256
Most Valuable Mauers	0.255	0.336	0.441	3.42	5.76	3.42	0.54	0.298
WalnutCreekWolfpack	0.244	0.315	0.403	2.39	9.37	2.02	0.92	0.238
Return of the ATPL	0.308	0.387	0.626	3.21	6.86	3.86	0.64	0.293
Hammarby	0.288	0.338	0.434	3.15	6.50	2.96	1.18	0.262
Mike Sweeny Fan Club	0.282	0.341	0.507	3.41	7.54	3.41	0.49	0.259
Bumpin' Utleys	0.284	0.351	0.456	3.35	6.89	2.42	0.74	0.265
WestSideConnectGang	0.260	0.330	0.391	4.76	6.75	5.22	1.38	0.250
Ballard Killbots	0.297	0.407	0.528	3.60	9.90	5.70	0.90	0.288
BattlestarGrantica	0.226	0.392	0.378	4.80	7.95	2.48	2.15	0.281
Halfprice Henchmen	0.278	0.338	0.394	2.14	6.02	2.53	0.19	0.206
Honkbal Staars	0.263	0.297	0.359	5.73	8.32	3.51	1.66	0.289
Ichi-Chone FLeelix	0.246	0.324	0.392	5.51	6.22	4.62	0.89	0.335
League Average	0.269	0.349	0.450	3.74	7.41	3.50	1.03	0.269

ATPL totally destroyed some pitchers' confidence, leaving them as empty shells of despair and shattered dreams, which the ConfusedCricketClub then promptly restored. Ballard Killbots, or "Billbots" as I keep calling them in my head for some reason (it's early), and SLUT (Dodgers) did some pretty good work with the bat. I know I'm bias, but check out how awesome Battlestar's Isolated Patience is!

Solid pitching by the CCC, WCWP, and HH, with the Wolfpack's components probably the strongest of the bunch. Look how many dudes the Billbots walked! They pretty much dominated the two true outcomes that don't involve having to twist their neck to see where the ball lands, which seems like a pretty solid health-conscious decision. If you look up "poor peripherals" in the dictionary there is just a picture of Jason making the "Wessssside" hand gesture while wearing his Porsche jacket.

And for the season:

[go back and look at the chart above again].

Keep up the good work, gang!